i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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