You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Randomize
