this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
