One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize