you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize