I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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