I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
time to smoke my breakfast
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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