He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
