And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize