I wannas sexs uuuuu
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
