erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
