Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize