YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Randomize
