It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I have aggressive nipples.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
