I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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