Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Just invented taco cereal.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
