What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
