I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize