awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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