I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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