i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
