i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Also, beer. Big fan.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
