I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize