idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
