those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
too bad you live with your parents still
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize