I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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