i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
