First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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