Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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