youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
she told me i tasted like america
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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