Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
