Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
