I have demons in me.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
