My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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