ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
