Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
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