oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
