Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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