absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
