That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
