Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
