I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
