I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
All the doctor said was why
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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