11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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