some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
