I just pynch a tree in the face
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize