You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
