Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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