He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize