wrigley field is MILF paradise
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
